Things That Make You Go Hmm....

I met this guy over the summer at a speed dating. We kept in touch over the past few months but just finally went out for dinner the other night.

We met at PJs in Haddonfield. I had a horrible day and wasn't really in the mood to go out but I wasn't really walking into an actual "date", I saw it as dinner with a friend. I wasn't sure if I was interested in the guy for a few reasons, so I didn't have any real high hopes anything would come of it, but then again, you never know.

We sat down for dinner. I ordered my favorite soup; french onion, well done, and a salad. He followed suit and ordered the same. We were making small talk about dating and how hard it can be at times when he says to me "I have to tell you something that will probably shock you." Now I've heard and seen just about everything when it comes to dating. Hell just the other night I had a man ask me if I was a witch. Apparently he had just had a date with a Wiccan so this was a new, standard question he asked women. I should have showed up on our date dressed like this...I have a feeling if I had he wouldn't have cared if I was, indeed, a witch!

In fact, he probably would have asked me to spank him with my broom...but I digress.

 

As I waited to hear what this "shocking" news could be, I couldn't have conjured up in my head what came out of his mouth next. He said "I'm a swinger." Now I thought one had to have a partner to swing, which was my first question. Here you can be single and swing, I guess it may not be as easy as being coupled up but one can swing solo. I was flabbergasted. I mean WTF - I have been on a lot of weird dates but this one was taking the cake. He then pulled out his wallet and handed me his "Pleasure Den" or some shit like that membership card to let me know he was for real. Yeah, really fucking weird!

 

I asked him a bunch of questions, one of them being if I could blog about him. He said I could, that is, if I joined him one night at one of the parties he goes to. I said hell no! Though honestly I am curious as to what goes on at one of these shindigs. Spankings? Whippings? Man on man? Man with man and woman? Woman and man while others watch? Is there a two for one deal some nights? But at the end of the day, tattoos and all, I am a conservative woman when it comes to sex, especially being shared and me sharing my man.

 

Needless to say things would never work out with my swinging friend, but hell were my eyes opened up to a world most of us never think about. He said swingers are regular people, just like you and me, which I can totally see. We are all a little freaky deaky in our own way, and if swinging is what gets you turned on, then I saw swing away!

 

The next day I checked my OK Cupid account. I was matched up with a transsexual man. Yes a transsexual man. He was in the midst of reclaiming his manhood (literally) after being raised female. I suppose he was a hermaphrodite at birth. He was my match of the day. My fucking match of the day. Sometimes you just have to shake your head and laugh at the insanities of trying to meet someone. Swingers, witches, hermaphrodites...all within a five day period. All I need now is a midget hitting on me. Oh wait, yup, that already happened.